All the news fit to sorta print

Wow, the world is just crazy right now. No, really, there is more than just an Israeli-Lebanon-Palestinian conflict. Kim Jong-Il has gone Kim Jong-Il, that means he's gone crazy. President Bush is about to use his first veto, on stem cell research of all things. The San Andreas Fault is primed for a major quake. In many instances, the situation for Iraqis is worse under U.S. occupation than it was under Saddam Hussein's rule.

Phew, let me catch my breath. Where have I been while all this has happened? Well, I got a new job - I will be a teacher beginning Aug. 21. I also got Lasik surgery. Yes, no more glasses for me. So I've sort of been occupied with that stuff.

Anyway, back to the real news.

San Andreas Fault - Why isn't anyone talking about this? The biggest fault in California is set to go off and we just sit back and talk about Pam's and Kid Rock's marriage? There hasn't been a major quake on the fault in 300 years. As a result, "the fault has accumulated a slip deficit of roughly 19 to 26 feet." That means that there will be an earthquake magnitude 8.0 or above if the fault slips 19 to 26 feet in a single event. Crazy, huh?

But let's not talk about this. Let's talk about something a little less scary. Something like ruthless North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il having long-range nuclear missiles.

North Korea - Before I begin, let me say that I feel bad for Kim Jong-Il. Yeah, he's a ruthless dictator who's killed thousands and thousands of his people. He's a bastard, in fact. But dude screams, "Look at me, look at me!" Fires off a few missiles, including a long-range missile that malfunctions less than a minute after takeoff. Then Israel steps in and says, "This is how you get the world's attention." Lo and behold, the world is asking, "What's a North Korea?" My hunch is that dude just wants some food and other goodies to feed his people so that he won't get overthrown.

Well, now that North Korea is off the front page of the New York Times, maybe it's time to talk about Iraq. Wait, are we allowed to? CIA, are you tracking my blog? I am not a terrorist. I'm not even Arab or Muslim. I'm a Mexican. No, I'm not a Zapatista. I'm a Mexican Catholic. Now that I got that out of the way... Let's talk Iraq.

Iraq - I have no other way of saying this, but it's getting all f---ed up over there. Sunnis are killing Shiites. Shiites are killing Sunnis. Iranians are getting murdered. Mosques are getting destroyed. Christians are fleeing for safety in Syria of all places. This is nuts. Nearly 6,000 people were killed in May and June. That's 100 civilians a day.

(Sarcasm alert) However, Iraq is so 2005. We're there. Let's just support our troops as the situation deteriorates into a bloody civil war. I mean, withdraw them? Crazy. Only idiots would think it's time to withdraw our troops. We need to be there until the job is done. (sarcasm off)

Israel - Then there's Israel. Can't go a whole six months without Israel being a major story in every American newspaper and news channel. It's kind of sad when I can name Israel's Prime Minister (Ehud Olmert), but I can't name Mexico's new president or Canada's prime minister.

A soldier gets kidnapped by Hamas in Palestine, Israel attacks full force knocking out the fledgling country's infrastructure. The reasoning? Palestine isn't doing enough to disarm its terrorist groups.

Two soldiers get kidnapped by Hezbollah in Lebanon, Israel bombs the crap out of the country and continues to do so. The reasoning? Lebanon isn't doing enough to disarm its terrorist groups.

In fact, Olmert (Israel's prime minister remember?) said that his country won't stop until it disarms Hezbollah and Hamas itself. But it also might pick up some new land at the Southern Lebanon border. Also, don't be surprised if Israeli troops never leave the West Bank.

I'm so sick of this conflict. So freaking sick of it. I'm sick of my tax money being used to support an Israel that reacts with collective punishment. Don't know what collective punishment is? Well, imagine a person in your neighborhood committing a horrible crime like kidnapping. It really has nothing to do with you though. But instead of the punishment being directed at that single person, the entire neighborhood, no the entire infrastructure - power lines, gas lines, sewage lines - are bombed and destroyed. Well, that's what Israel does. Then its leaders wonder why the terrorists don't stop attacking their country. Then the West wonders why Arabs hate them. I mean, Israel commits a war crime, which collective punishment is, the West says that Lebanon and Palestine are in the wrong. Talk about blaming the victim.

Look, I have no love for terrorist organizations. They are evil and need to be stamped out. But I have even less love for a country that commits terrorism itself and then gets applauded for it. Israel needs to stop its actions. The Arab countries in that region have all said that they will recognize a Jewish state in Israel, but that's only after Israel recognizes the Palestinian state. But they won't. Why? Because illegal settlers will not leave their illegally built houses on foreign land. Olmert, the prime minister, needs to sack up and stop providing protection for these illegal settlers. Then he needs to allow Palestine to become a stable state that way it can stomp out its terrorist organizations.

Blah, anyway, that's my attempt to catch up with the recent news around the world. I'm sure I'll have more to say about these things as they progress. I'm out.